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LOKI: Enough! I am a god, you green ugly creature! And I will not be bullied by you!
HULK: [Smashes] Puny god.
— The Avengers
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Putting this one under a spoiler cut, for those poor souls who haven’t seen the movie yet. … Or the myriad of gifs on tumblr.
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MR. MACCLAY: This is insane. You people have no right to interfere with Tara’s affairs. We … are her blood kin! Who the hell are you?
BUFFY: We’re family.
DONNY: Daaad. You — you gonna let ‘em just… Tara, if you don’t get in that car, I swear by god I will beat you down.
XANDER: And I swear by your full and manly beard, you’re gonna break something trying.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Family” (5.6)
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MORDECAI: Cleanse them. Cleanse the world of their ignorance and sin. Bathe them in the crimson of … [pause] Am I on speakerphone?!
HADLEY: No, no of course not.
— Cabin in the Woods
For my good pal Screech. :)
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FREDDY: Murder? What murder? You’re not here about the review?
OZ: The review?
FREDDY: Yeah. Last Thursday.
OZ: [reads] Dingoes Ate My Baby play their instruments as if they have plump polish sausages taped to their fingers.
FREDDY: Sorry man.
OZ: No, it’s fair.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Earshot” (3.18)
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BUFFY: Everybody, this is Rona.
POTENTIALS, XANDER, and ANDREW: Hey, Rona.
RONA: Um… why is that guy [Andrew] tied to a chair?
XANDER: The question you’ll soon be asking is, “Why isn’t he gagged?”
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Showtime” (7.11)
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BUFFY: Okay, first of all, what’s with the outfit? Live in the now, okay? You look like DeBarge! Now, we can do this the hard way, or… well, actually there’s just the hard way.
DARLA: That’s fine with me!
BUFFY: Are you sure? Now, this in not gonna be pretty. We’re talking violence, strong language, adult content… [Dusts Thomas] See what happens when you roughhouse?
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Welcome to the Hellmouth” (1.1)
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WASH: Yes. Yes. This is a fertile land and we will thrive. We will rule over all this land! And we will call it… this land! I think we should call it your grave! Ah! Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal! Ha ha ha! Mine is an evil laugh! Now die! Oh no god! Oh, dear God in heaven!
— Firefly, “Serenity” (1.1)
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BUFFY: What is this?
XANDER: What do you mean, what is it? It’s my thing.
BUFFY: Your thing?
XANDER: My thing.
BUFFY: Is this a penis metaphor?
XANDER: It’s my thing that makes me cool. You know, that makes me unique. I’m Car Guy. Guy with the car.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “The Zeppo” (3.13)
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COWBOYS: The Evil League of Evil
Is watching so beware
The grade that you receive
Will be your last we swear!
— Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along-Blog (Act I)
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BUFFY: I always say patrol’s not complete without a trip to the stinky sewers.
ANGEL: I’m sure I saw him come down here.
BUFFY: Couldn’t we just let this be the vamp that got away? We could say he was this big.
ANGEL: What can I say? I need closure.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “The Prom” (3.20)
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BOOK:Yes, I’d forgotten you’re moonlighting as a criminal mastermind now. Got your next heist planned?
SIMON:No. But I’m thinking about growing a big black mustache. I’m a traditionalist.
— Firefly, “War Stories” (1.10)
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XANDER: Don’t look at me. This is a Summers’ thing. It’s all very violent.
BUFFY: If you get killed, I’m telling.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Chosen” (7.22)
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GROOSALUGG: You and I have fought side by side on more than one occasion — fellow warriors, shoulder to shoulder. By now, my counsel must assuredly hold weight, so I beseech you to heed my words… “Pomegranate Mist” is the wrong colorfor this room.
FRED: We were just thinking… Well, I was thinking and Groo agreed… That, well, since we have to repaint your room anyway, maybe you’d like a change. Y’know, for a change.
ANGEL: Groo agreed?
CORDELIA: Don’t mock. He’s actually got a surprisingly good color sense.
GROOSALUGG: “Sunburst splendor” is a hue more worthy of a champion.
— Angel, “The Price” (3.19)
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