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MR. MACCLAY: This is insane. You people have no right to interfere with Tara’s affairs. We … are her blood kin! Who the hell are you?
BUFFY: We’re family.
DONNY: Daaad. You — you gonna let ‘em just… Tara, if you don’t get in that car, I swear by god I will beat you down.
XANDER: And I swear by your full and manly beard, you’re gonna break something trying.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Family” (5.6)
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ANYA: All I know is I really want to go to this dance and I want someone to go with me.
XANDER: Be still my heart. Oh wait, it is. How come I got the short straw?
ANYA: You’re not quite as obnoxious as most of the alpha males around here. Plus I know you don’t have a date.
XANDER: I haven’t settled on anyone yet.
ANYA: Fine. Look, I know you find me attractive. I’ve seen you looking at my breasts.
XANDER: Nothing personal, but when a guy does that, it just means his eyes are open.
ANYA: Whatever. Look, do you wanna go with me or not?
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “The Prom” (3.20)
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GILES: Now tell me about this review. No one said anything to me about this.
TRAVERS: Let’s sit down and talk about it over here.
GILES: [to rest of the Watchers] You all stand around and look somber. Good job.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Checkpoint” (5.12)
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XANDER: Look, it’s not a good idea.
WILLOW: There’s no use arguing with me. Do you see my resolve face? You’ve seen it before. You know what it means. This can help Buffy. If we turn Angel back soon enough, we can stop him from ever awakening Acathla.
OZ: Okay, I pretty much missed out on some stuff, didn’t I? Because this is all making a kind of sense that’s… not.
WILLOW: Go with Cordy to the library and get my things. She’ll fill you in.
OZ: Sure. I’ll drive.
WILLOW: Xander, go to Buffy. Tell her what we’re doing. Maybe she can stall.
XANDER: But I—
WILLOW: Resolve face.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Becoming Part 2” (2.22)
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ZOE: Planet’s coming up a mite fast.
WASH: That’s just ‘cause— I’m going down too quick. Likely crash and kill us all.
MAL: Well, that happens, let me know.
— Firefly, “Shindig” (1.4)
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WILLOW: Do you think he’s dead?
BUFFY: We can’t be sure. Pick up the pieces and keep them separate.
CORDELIA: Pieces? We get the pieces. Our job sucks!
OZ: Uh… Arm.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Innocence” (2.14)
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MAL:Miss Nandi, I have a confession tomake.
NANDI:Maybe I should get the Shepherd.
MAL:Well, I ain’t sinned yet, and I’dfeel little more than awkwardif he were here when I did.
NANDI:You expect to accomplish somethingsinful then, do you?
MAL:If I’m overstepping my bounds, youlet me know.
NANDI: [Extraordinarily impatient Buddha], Malcolm, I been waiting for you to kiss me since I showed you my guns — [they kiss]You okay with this?
MAL: I’m just waiting to see if I passout. Long story.
— Firefly, “Heart of Gold” (1.13)
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BILLY: That’s the plan
Rule the world
You and me
Love your hair
BILLY: No, I, uh, love the air.
— Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along-Blog (Act I)
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SUNDAY: Slayer! Wow, uhm, I heard you might be coming here. This is, I mean, what a challenge! The slayer!
BUFFY: And you are?
SUNDAY: I’m Sunday, I’ll be killing you here in a minute or so.
BUFFY: You know that threat gets more frightening every time I hear it.
SPICOLI!VAMP: … Uhh… are we gonna fight? Or is there just gonna be a monster sarcasm rally?
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “The Freshman” (4.1)
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BUFFY: These endless days are finally ending in a blaze.
ALL: And we are caught in the fire
At the point of no return
So we will walk through the fire
And let it
Let it burn
Let it burn
Let it burn!
SWEET: Show time.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Once More With Feeling” (6.7)
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WESLEY: Forgive me, Gunn. I should never have opened my mouth.
GUNN: I’ve got a plan.
WESLEY: Oh thank god! What is it? [Rebels begin countdown to execution]
GUNN: We die horribly and painfully, you go to hell and I spend eternity in the arms of baby Jesus.
— Angel, “There’s No Place Like Plrtz Glrb” (2.22)
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SPIKE: What’s this? Sitting around watching the telly while there’s evil still a foot? That’s not very industrious of you. I say we go out there and kick a little demon ass! What, can’t go without your Buffy, is that it? Too chicken? Let’s find her! She is the Chosen One after all. Come on! Vampires! Grrr! Nasty! Let’s annihilate them. For justice! And for… the safety of puppies… and Christmas, right? Let’s fight that evil! Let’s kill something! … Oh come on.
— Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Doomed” (4.11)
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SIMON: I thought she was getting better.
JAYNE: And I thought they was getting off. Didn’t we have an intricate plan on how they was gonna be not here anymore?
KAYLEE: We couldn’t leave them now.
JAYNE: No. Now that she’s a killer woman we ought to be bringin’ her tea and dumplings.
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